


Baby, Don't Say No

by kat_alyst



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Chance Meetings, F/F, F/M, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Second Chances, Weddings, ex-lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-22 12:48:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9608225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kat_alyst/pseuds/kat_alyst
Summary: Kaneki was used to running away from all his problems, literally.Three years later, one problem showed up right in front of him when he least expected it, in the form of his Ex-boyfriend that he left years prior without an explanation.And from there, with the help of a bit of alcohol, everything went out of control.





	1. Hurry and Tell me

**Author's Note:**

> *covers face* I've had such a massive writers block since I've had exams. Now I'm back with this rubbish again.
> 
> Someone please take away my writing capabilities.

Kaneki slumped more into his chair, trying to look as small and inconspicuous as possible, surrounded by the multitudes of guests and raucous chatter and clinking of glasses. The presence of one dreaded person in the room weighing his mind and body down despite the nice atmosphere.

 

Nishiki and Kimi’s wedding had been beautiful, the ceremony having taken place in a relatively large garden full of blossoming daisies and sunflowers with orchids enveloping the arch. When he had received an invitation in March for the event, he had been slightly nervous to see his long-time friends after _years_ , but pleasantly surprised that Nishiki had actually built up the courage to pop the question (finally).

Any sort of hesitancy left once he got there.

It looked straight out of a fairy-tale book he read as a child. Hinami as flower girl scattering white petals down the stoned path, Touka, Yoriko and a few other women he didn’t recognise along as bridesmaids in sweet lilac colours. Of course, the main attraction was the bride herself in arm with Yoshimura, dressed in a flowing white gown, veil hiding her pinned hair.

Kaneki did cry, quite a lot. He ended up wiping his nose on his crisp new suit because Irimi had used all her tissues on herself. He couldn’t stop himself, the tears flowing down his cheeks as Nishiki gaped at her with the softest eyes he’s ever seen.

_Is this what love looks like?_

Although, he did laugh when he saw, for the first time ever, what Nishiki looked like when he was scared. His hands shook so much while slipping the ring onto Kimi’s finger that it missed several times.

In fact, the whole congregation, seated on sophisticated white metal chairs on the freshly cut lawn, laughed at that moment. One laugh stood out to Kaneki, loud and boisterous, the warm sun seeming dimmer compared to it, resounding deep in his soul.

Kaneki’s laugh cut short as a cold feeling settled over him.

At the front, to Nishiki’s right as best man. White suit, tanned skin, ruffled blond hair, bright slanted grin, brown eyes.

He looks good. Really, really good.

 _Hide…_ Kaneki mouthed, shaken to the core. He squinted, inspecting at the man, checking again and again whether it was a look-alike or not. His eyes must be acting up, maybe he should have brought his glasses after all. _It can’t be…_

But that laugh is too unique, too _Hide._

Kaneki felt sick, the feelings he had repressed for years threatening to burst from its cage hidden down in his heart. Hide stood there, tall and mature looking, wiping his eyes from tears of laughter with a grin so boyish that Kaneki was thrown right back to his younger years.

_How much have we changed?_

From then on, Kaneki kept his head down and avoided as much eye contact with people as he could, just in case he saw _him_ again. Hopefully he didn’t notice Kaneki’s presence and the wedding could be escaped without complications, the bride and groom’s first dance long gone and people going up to dance on the floor by that time.

He should have known that nothing would go to plan.

 At the afterparty venue, a modernised country hall with gold and blue decorations, he didn’t stray from his assigned table, the mission **‘Avoid Ex’** taking priority, and Touka hadn’t questioned his quietness. A miracle since they were the only two sitting at a ten-seated table.

Until now.

“You know.” Touka started, placing her glass of burgundy on the table after a sip. “I don’t know what you’re doing but whatever it is, it’s making you look even more shifty and conspicuous.”

He moved his head from his arms to meet her disapproving eyes. Then sighed.

“I’m not doing anything.” Kaneki groans, moving back into a respectable sitting position. “I just feel a little queasy.” It’s not a lie. That horrible feeling of dread ever since he saw the best man hadn’t left.

“So, your telling me that this has nothing to do with that blond idiot three tables over.” Kaneki almost choked on air when Touka challenged him with a raised eyebrow. She nicked her head towards said table, the man causing all of Kaneki’s troubles at the centre making guests laugh.

Of course, Touka knew. She always knew. What’s the point of trying to lie?

“It may or may not have to do him.” Kaneki admitted with lowered eyes, playing with the cuffs of his jacket.

“Don’t you want to speak to him?” Touka asked plainly, stealing a cracker from his own plate and shoving it in her mouth.

“I don’t know!” Kaneki hissed, that was the very question he feared he would be asked. And he wasn’t sure, he didn’t like confrontation, he was terrible with words.

But then why every day for the past two years has he thought about all the situations in which he could see Hide.

He wanted to apologise. For everything.

“I don’t think you understand.” Touka said, leaning closer towards him to speak over the loud background music. “He knows you’re here. You _have_ to talk.”

“Ha?! How do you know?” Kaneki panicked, eyes fliting over to the blond mop of hair, which he was horrified to learn had disappeared from the table.

“He’s been eyeing you for the whole evening.” Kaneki’s heart fluttered and he couldn’t help becoming warm at the revelation.

“Really?” He whispered shyly, scanning the crowd for the man. However, many people wore white suits, and blond hair had suddenly become a popular colour among them.

“Huh!?” Touka looked as if she was straining to hear Kaneki, and he realised that his words had been drowned out by the noise of their surroundings.

“It doesn’t matter.”

Touka gave him a suspicious glare but backed away.

“I think you should have a drink.” She suggested, nicking her head towards his untouched glass. “Lighten up.” Kaneki raised an eyebrow apprehensively.

She pointedly drank from her glass.

“Trust me, alcohol does wonders for heart ache.” Kaneki considered her credibility on matters of love but Touka’s eyes seemed to glaze over as she spoke, so he decided to take her word for it.

“Fine.”

_What was the worst that could happen?_

 

An hour later, Kaneki found himself slumped over the bar with a tower of empty glasses by his head.

He couldn’t have drunk that much, he only remembers having three drinks before falling asleep (he was embarrassingly lightweight).

“…Ugh.” He groaned while lifting his head from the uncomfortable surface. The bartender was missing, and Touka was nowhere to be found. She had originally come with him to order shots but had disappeared halfway through.

He also felt like shit. However, Touka was right about one thing, his heart no longer felt heavy. In fact, he felt weightless. He also felt cold, his jacket somehow missing.

His eyes momentarily unfocused due to his condition, and he rubbed his eyes tiredly.

“Oh, your awake.”

The hairs on the back of Kaneki’s neck rose. Oh God. _Not him, anyone else, please not him._

Kaneki slowly turned his head, praying that it was just his drunken haze that was causing him to hear things.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t drunk enough for that to be true.

“Hide…” He breathed, staring wide eyed at the man who sat two stools away.  

Hide sat on the edge of the stool, with his jacket splayed open, rolled up sleeves, half his white shirt untucked and top button of undone. He still managed to look ridiculously amazing, and up close Kaneki could see exactly how his face had matured and how his hair was longer and how much taller he had become.

Kaneki swallowed as he met Hide’s gaze.

“It’s late, you know.” Hide’s voice was gruff, and he looked back down into his glass of brandy, swishing it around absent-mindedly. “You should go home. They’re clearing up now.”

Kaneki shook his head, still in a daze from being so close to the other. Did Hide stay here just to watch over him, but why would he do that? Thinking about it made his head hurt.

“Uh- yeah…” He answered dumbly, not knowing how to act around the other. Kaneki was at a complete loss for words, after three years of not seeing each other he thought he would have a lot to say. Yet he was tongue-tied, not knowing whether he should go straight into explaining himself or not, it didn’t feel like the right time.

“How’ve you been.” Hide asked suddenly, still finding his glass more interesting than Kaneki.

_Am I that disgusting that Hide won’t look at me?_

He had no right to feel miserable because of that, so he desperately tried to hold back tears that threaten to fall from his eyes. Touka was wrong after all, the alcohol only made him more emotional and insecure.

Kaneki remembered that he’d been asked a question and sucked in a breath.

“I-I’ve been...” _Not good. Never good. Always thinking about you. Regretting my actions. Wondering if you would ever talk to me again. Worrying if I was unredeemable, if I’m too bad for you, if you would forgive me._ “Fine.” He said awkwardly instead.

Hide hummed, and Kaneki could tell he was unimpressed with his blatant lie.

“That’s good.”

The silence that came after was excruciatingly painful to endure. Kaneki struggled to find something to say, squirming in his chair as he debated what the best way to start his apology.

He could just explain what happened and why he left, Hide deserved that much.

“Hide-”

Hide abruptly stood up, pushing his drink away from himself. Kaneki jolted at sudden movement.

“I’m gonna go now.” He announced with a grimace, giving Kaneki one last glace before walking away to the side exit doors.

Kaneki blanched, having received no time to interject. This couldn’t be it for them, he realised he didn’t want this to be the end for them. His heart ached while he watched Hide’s back get further and further away, almost as if he was waiting to see if Kaneki would stop him.

_Think, think!_

He almost ripped out his hair from his own cowardice, he was too scared to stop Hide. Yet, he didn’t want his weakness to get the best of him _again._ So, without thinking, he got off his stool and ran to catch up with Hide just as he was pushing the door opens.

“Wait!” Kaneki cried, sighing in relief when Hide stops walking and turned back towards him, _finally_ looking Kaneki in the eye.

Kaneki stopped a few steps away from the door, and Hide watched him expectantly.

“I- um, I’ve lost my jacket.” Kaneki panted, inwardly praising himself for thinking of an excuse. “I don’t have my wallet or keys.”

Hide blinked at him, visibly weighing the situation in his head. “You want a ride?”

Kaneki nodded, eyes wide in anticipation.

Hide ran a hand through his hair and huffed, but his eyes seemed somewhat lighter.

“Okay.”

 

The whole car journey had been silent, the radio offering the only source of noise. In the passenger seat, Kaneki was even closer to Hide and sometimes had the urge to reach out to him.

But he didn’t, because he knew Hide no longer felt the same way. It was selfish to expect Hide to still want him after so long, after everything. Though, he could hope.

Kaneki quietly recited the address of his hotel to Hide and that was the only time they spoke to one another.

He distractedly watched the view of the outside world through the car window, the blur of dark greens and browns of the suburbs turning into the black and white of the inner city. With each passing minute, Kaneki’s heart rate quickened.

_Time was running out._

All the while, Hide drove without uttering a word, unaffected by the tense atmosphere.  Kaneki tried to keep his eyes from wandering over to him too much, which was proving hard because of the time they were spending in the car alone.

“This is it, right?” Hide asked far too soon, slowing the car to a stop outside a large hotel.

“Yes.” Kaneki said, rigidly unbuckling his seatbelt.

It’s now or never.

He stalled at the door handle, facing away from Hide and going over what he needed to say with a hard gulp.

“Hide,” He began, “I want you to know that-”

“Kaneki.” Hide interrupted, and Kaneki halted while nervously turning to face the other. Hide’s face was hard, and his grip on the steering was tight enough to turn his knuckles white.

 “Either say goodbye right now, or show me how sorry you are.”

Kaneki gaped, stunned by Hide’s ultimatum.

“I know what you want to say,” He resumed, taking his hand of the wheel to loosen his tie, drawing Kaneki's eyes towards the tantalising flash of skin revealed there. “But I don’t want to hear it if you’re just going to leave.”

“Okay,” Kaneki blurted before his mind could catch up to him, surprising Hide. “I’ll show you... I’ll show you how sorry I am. I’ll show you how much I’ve changed.” With each word, Kaneki grew bolder, not afraid to stare deep into Hide’s honey brown eyes so that he can see that he meant everything.

“I’ll show you how wrong I was. Just don’t say no, and I’ll show you everything.” Kaneki finished, voice desperate and out of breath from speaking and from how intently Hide stared at him. His cheeks were hot and he felt slightly unnerved, but he didn’t back down, waiting restlessly for a response.

Hide whistled lowly, shaking hishead with a lopsided grin spreading across his face.

“Show me then.”

 


	2. I Can't Go On Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Under his slightly drunk haze, Kaneki thought that maybe this wasn’t such a smart idea.

_“I-I can’t do this anymore…”_

\---

 

Under his slightly drunk haze, Kaneki thought that _maybe_ this wasn’t such a smart idea. As in, going straight into being intimate with his ex after ten minutes’ worth of dialogue. God, now he thought about it, it sounded really bad.

But with each peck Hide placed on his collarbone, those thoughts were blown away. The sweet feeling of Hide caressing his skin through his unbuttoned shirt was slowly killing him, it’s a wonder how he even had time to think.

 

After Hide had accepted his offer, it was an unintelligible blur of time between them in the car and Kaneki half naked on the hotel bed with Hide between his legs. He can barely remember retrieving the spare key and swiping open the door or stumbling down the hallway to his room.

Maybe because it didn’t matter. All that mattered was when he finally allowed himself to throw himself all over the other, Hide holding his arms out to receive him like they had never been separated.

_Fuck… I’ve missed him so much._

“I’ve missed you so much.” Kaneki croaked, fingers gripping the bedsheets tightly as Hide worked his way down his body, touching every piece of skin that he possibly could.

Hide paused, stopping to place a kiss at Kaneki’s navel.

“Me too.” He whispered, head nuzzling Kaneki’s stomach before moving towards his pants. Hide pulled Kaneki’s zipper down, slowly dragging it off with his fingers teasingly brushing against Kaneki’s thighs.

Kaneki kicked them off from around his ankles, but couldn’t help but notice how unfair the situation was.

“Uh- Hide you’ve still got all your clothes on.” Kaneki mumbled, half-panting and red in the face, feeling too exposed, with only his underwear and wide open shirt, compared to the other who was fully dressed.

Hide looked up at him from between his legs and flashed a devilish smirk.

“Hmm, you’re right.” He said with a mischievous glint to his eyes. “I guess I’ll just take it _all_ off.”

Kaneki knew he should have just stayed quiet.

Hide proceeded to get on his knees and pop every single button of his shirt open, _slowly_. All Kaneki could do was stare, face burning as hot as the sun, with wide eyes and a very, very dry mouth.

To top it all off, Hide had the gall to wink at him while shimmying out of his shirt.

“You’re so embarrassing, Hide.” Kaneki covered his face in mortification, but ended up peeking through his fingers, pretending that he currently was _not_ ogling Hide’s impressively toned body. _He had really matured_ , physically at least.

Whether Hide had matured mentally was another question.

“Are you sure about that?” Hide teased, ruffling a hand though his hair, still with that awful grin on his face.

“Yes.” Kaneki deadpanned.

“You’re so mean, Kaneki.”

“Just hurry up.” He grumbled impatiently, crossing his arms to stop the cold air of the room getting to his chest.

“Okay, okay.” Hide sang, pulling the zipper of his trousers down, shuffling around to get them off. Kaneki actually choked on his own spit once the brunt of Hide’s… _quite_ large length was fully exposed. Ah, shit. _Was it really that long before?_

It’s not like Kaneki’s a virgin or anything, him and Hide did have sex (sometimes) while in their relationship but, who was Kaneki kidding? After years of having absolutely nothing going anywhere near his ass, except toilet roll, how was that _thing_ going to fit there again?!

He really didn’t think this through.

But his reasoning was still disturbed by the alcohol.

Hide, unaware of Kaneki’s inner plight, advanced between his legs and was ready to continue from where they left off.

“Hey, do you have stuff to use?” Hide asked, absentmindedly stroking Kaneki’s bare pale thighs soothingly. Kaneki had to take a moment to breathe, those fingers lingering near to his underwear serving as a massive distraction.

“No, unless the hotel has lube hidden in the drawers.” He said, it was meant to be a sarcastic comment but it left him with a sad twist in his gut. Kaneki was desperately aching for so much more than what they had already done. He just wanted Hide to ravish him like there was no tomorrow, he wanted to remember what it felt to be full of fervour. But if there was no lube or anything then they could do nothing that would satisfy him.

Kaneki subconsciously reached his hand out, finding Hide’s and interlacing their fingers together.

_Closer._

Hide raised an eyebrow in surprise, but didn’t question Kaneki’s sudden behaviour. Instead, he pressed a small kiss to the back of Kaneki’s hand.

“We’ll figure something out.” He reassured, pulling himself up so he was hovering completely over Kaneki’s body.

Hide raised his free hand to stroke Kaneki’s cheek, before leaning down so that only a thin line of air separated their skin. Kaneki squeezed tightly on his hand, arching his back into him as a sign of invitation.

He stared through half-lidded eyes at Hide, wetting his lips. Hide followed the movement intently, pupils blown wide.

Kaneki whined impatiently, wondering what Hide was waiting for. However, as soon as he opened his mouth, Hide dived down to capture his bottom lip, sucking and biting down to make Kaneki forget he ever wanted to say anything.

_Closer._

“Yes…” Kaneki moaned into the deepening kiss, wrapping his arm around Hide’s neck to pull him even closer. He was already hopelessly lost in the feeling of Hide’s lips on his own, tongues entwining with each other’s.

“We’ll- ah- - figure something out.”

 

\--

 

Hide distractedly ran his hand through the hair of sleeping man wrapped around his side.

Kaneki’s hair was like feathers, white and soft as clouds could be. It was fluffed up from sex and Hide did the best he could to flatten it, but he hesitated for a while. Kaneki looked cute like this.

With his head tucked in Hide’s neck, naked and his leg hitched over Hide’s waist.

He looked beautiful, Hide thought. _Everything about him was beautiful_ , that was originally why Hide became so attracted to him. Even though they were opposites, even though Kaneki couldn’t stand boisterous people and even though Hide hated reading plain old books.

For some reason, they were inseparable.

_Well… until Kaneki left._

His fingers travelled down from the top of Kaneki’s hair to his resting face.

Hide watched as Kaneki shifted slightly as his hand grazed Kaneki’s face, the white-haired man letting out a small breath against his collarbone before relaxing again.

It was scary having Kaneki back in his arms again. Hide felt as if Kaneki could disappear right at that moment, vanish into thin air, just like three years ago.

Hide didn’t know whether he wanted to know where Kaneki had gone for all that time. It was better to remain in this ignorant bliss, where he could pretend Kaneki had never left him. But at times, throughout these years, Hide wanted to know why he had left. Hide had wanted to shout and cry and demand answers, but now with Kaneki laying there so peacefully, he regretted thinking of doing any of those things.

Suddenly, Kaneki snuggled further into Hide’s side, like he could feel the unease radiating from him. Hide shook his head, ridding himself of his thoughts. When Kaneki woke up he’ll deal with them, for now he’ll rest.

Annoyingly, when he closed his eyes a faint sound of buzzing coming from the floor disturbs him. He tried to ignore it, wanting to stay in his warm retreat under the covers forever.

However, after the third consecutive buzz he reluctantly removed himself from Kaneki and stood up, sighing harshly.

“This better be good.” He mumbled to himself, quickly throwing on his underwear that he had discarded on the floor previously. His trousers lay carelessly on the floor a few feet away from the bed, and he bent down to fumble around for the pocket in which his phone sat.

After picking up his phone, he checks the time. It was only early in the morning, he didn’t know who would be --

**(3) missed calls**

**(7) messages**

Hide’s stomach dropped. He unlocked his phone with tense arms, scrolling through his messages that he had missed because of the wedding He hadn’t thought to check his phone the entire time.

 

_Miyo:_ **17:36**

**How’s the wedding?**

**Hope you’re having a good time <3**

_Miyo:_ **23:10**

**Is the wedding finished yet?**

**Drive home safely! :)**

_Miyo:_ **06:34**

**Hideyoshi where are you!?**

**I’m worried, please answer my calls**

**I’ll be waiting at home xx**

“Fuck.” Hide whispered into his hand. He pocketed the phone, not being able to bear to look at the messages anymore.  He took one look at the sleeping man on the bed, who was grasping out towards Hide’s side of the bed, and decided that he was the world’s _biggest_ idiot.

“Fuck…” Hide repeated, forcing himself to look away from the scene. He squeezed his eyes shut, slapping the side of his head to punish himself for being such a fool. He was so caught up in the fact that Kaneki had returned that he forgot everything about reality…

Everything about _her_. 

 

After two minutes of sitting on he floor, debating on what to do while feeling like absolute shit, he sent a text back and began to put his rumpled clothes back on.

This was for the best, Hide finally decided, even though it was an obvious lie and left him with a saddening hollow feeling inside.

 

_I’m so sorry, Kaneki._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops
> 
> Sorry for these spread out updates, I have dumb stuff like studying so I can never promise frequent updates for anything :( :(
> 
> THANKS FOR ALL THE KUDOS + COMMENTS ANYWAY even though i'm so fickle when it comes to writing!


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